So You Think You Want To Be A Surrogate?
*Ivy - Surrogate
“I felt in a very real way that I had made their (the IP’s) happiness possible. It was a very different feeling from having my own child — I felt like I was simply returning the baby that they had given me to care for nine months. I experienced no sense of regret or “giving up” something. I just felt that I had fulfilled a wonderful responsibility, and there was satisfaction in that.” The support and one on one attention I received from Surrogate First were integral in my ability to see the big picture and keep me free from any feelings that would not be healthy for me or my pregnancy.
*Jodie - Three Time Surrogate
I was pretty attached to my intended parents; their story just broke my heart, and I could see what a good mom she would be. They were in the delivery room, and she helped me get through my contractions. I could tell she was really uncomfortable with how much pain I was in. She stated, ‘Someone should punch me (IP) in the stomach!’ To watch her exclaim the baby’s name when they handed him to her—was one of the most beautiful experiences of my whole life. You could just see everyone’s relief! Thank you Surrogate First for walking with me through every step of this journey. Without you, I would not have had the ability to make another family’s dreams come true.
SO YOU THINK YOU WANT TO BE A SURROGATE???
Being a surrogate means making the selfless choice to commit your time and energy to helping others. Many surrogates truly enjoy being pregnant, and have already completed their family, so being a surrogate gives women an opportunity to go through the miracle process of pregnancy, with the end result of making someone’s dream of having a baby a reality.
If this sounds like you, take the Surrogacy Quiz to see if you meet the initial requirements!
SURROGACY QUIZ
If you can answer “YES” to the questions below, contact Surrogate First to begin the application process with the company who will provide you with the most supportive services, answer any questions/concerns you have and walk with you through each step of the surrogacy journey :
- Live in a surrogate friendly state
- Do not use illicit drugs
- I am between 21-40 years old
- I am a U.S. Citizen, legal resident, or legal immigrant
- I am a non-smoker and live in a non-smoking house
- No criminal history or felony convictions
- Do not rely on governmental financial support
- I and my partner/spouse are willing to participate in psychological evaluations and criminal background checks
- I have given birth to at least one child, and am raising my child(ren)
- I can provide copies of my OB/GYN records
- BMI under 34
Becoming a surrogate is not something to be taken lightly. You need to take your time to think and prepare, be able to articulate your values and expectations pertaining to the pregnancy, birth defects, twins/triplets, and other situations that may present themselves, research and/or ask questions of our highly qualified staff, talk to your family/supports, and make sure that you are ready.
The surrogacy process can be a long process, one filled with joy and fulfillment, but it can also be difficult, or challenging at times. Being mentally, physically, and emotionally healthy is very important in this journey, which is why Surrogate First prides itself in a very special wellness package designed with you in mind!
While surrogates do get compensated for carrying the intended parents’ child, no compensation can compare to the overflowing joy you see when an IP first holds their baby that you selflessly carried and birthed for them. However, our Surrogates are compensated well, and start at 35k plus benefits.
Listed below are the “Timelines/Requirements to Becoming a Surrogate” so you can begin to understand how the process flows:
TIMELINE/REQUIREMENTS TO BECOMING A SURROGATE
CONDUCT SURROGACY RESEARCH: 1-6 MONTHS
Candidate conducts thorough online research
Candidate should speak to experienced surrogates
Call surrogatefirst for free no obligation consultation 424.567.3703
MEET NECESSARY REQUIREMENTS:
- Age between 21-40 years old
- BMI between 18-32
- Be a U.S. citizen, legal resident or legal immigrant
- Live in a surrogate-friendly state in the United States
- Not currently on governmental financial support
- Must have given birth to and be raising at least one child
- Healthy reproductive history with no major complications during pregnancies and birth
- Six months need to pass since last vaginal or cesarean birth
- Must provide OB/GYN records and a clearance letter
- Be willing to undergo subcutaneous and intramuscular injections
- A non-smoker living in a non-smoking home
- No history of criminal activity, no felony convictions
- Must not use illicit drugs
- No history of clinical mental illness
- Cannot be on antidepressants or anti-anxiety medication for past 12 months
- Must allow background checks both Surrogate and husband/partner
- Surrogate and Partner willing to undergo psychological consultation
- Ability to travel as needed for surrogacy appointments potentially overnight stays
- Must agree to a home visit with all persons and pets currently residing in the home
- Age between 21-40 years old
- BMI between 18-32
- Be a U.S. citizen, legal resident or legal immigrant
- Live in a surrogate-friendly state in the United States
- Not currently on governmental financial support
- Must have given birth to and be raising at least one child
- Healthy reproductive history with no major complications during pregnancies and birth
- Six months need to pass since last vaginal or cesarean birth
- Must provide OB/GYN records and a clearance letter
- Be willing to undergo subcutaneous and intramuscular injections
- A non-smoker living in a non-smoking home
- No history of criminal activity, no felony convictions
- Must not use illicit drugs
- No history of clinical mental illness
- Cannot be on anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medication for past 12 months
FIND AN AGENCY: 2 WEEKS-2 MONTHS
- Fill out interest form
- Phone call with Surrogate First
- Fill out application
- Long interview with Surrogate First
- Agency contract sign
- Medical background
- Background check
- Fill-out interest form
- Phone call with surrogatefirst within 24 hours
- Fill out Application
- Long interview with agency
- Medical History Review
- Previous OBGYN records
- Labor record and delivery records for each previous pregnancy
- Recent pap-smear results
- Any other pertinent medical information
- Sign Agency Contract
MEDICAL SCREENING: 1-4 WEEKS
PSYCHOLOGICAL EVALUATION: 1-2 WEEKS
Schedule IVF clinic visit with the physician, who will speak with you in detail and perform a surrogacy information assessment. The work up varies from clinic to clinic but typically includes:
- Vaginal ultrasound – a probe is inserted into the vagina enabling the technician to look at your uterus for polyps, scar tissue and lining thickness
- Physical and pap smear
- Hysteroscopy – a procedure where a small camera is placed in the uterus to look at the uterine cavity
- Medical instruction of the IVF cycle, injections, medication use and embryo transfer
MATCH WITH INTENDED PARENTS: 2 WEEKS-4 MONTHS
LEGAL CONTRACT-2-4 Weeks
SET UP WELLNESS PLAN-1 Week
START MEDICATIONS AND MONITORING APPOINTMENTS: 4 WEEKS
Start medications & begin attending monitoring appointments
EMBRYO TRANSFER
TRANSFER CONFIRMATION RESULT: 2 WEEKS FROM TRANSFER
FIRST ULTRASOUND: 4 WEEKS FROM TRANSFER
RELEASED TO OB CARE: 8-12 WEEKS FROM TRANSFER
PREGNANCY: 30 WEEKS FROM RELEASE TO OB
DELIVERY DATE: 38 WEEKS FROM TRANSFER
PUMPING: 0-16 WEEKS
POST BIRTH RECOVERY: 12 WEEKS
In closing, I want to share a letter from an IP to their surrogate so you can really feel what your commitment to the IP means to them:
Dear Surrogate,
We wanted to write and tell you how very excited we are that you agreed to help us build our family! You should know that we feel nothing short of awe about you. Your gift to us conjures up words like selfless, brave, spiritual and just plain incredible. We are fully aware that without people like you on this earth, people like us wouldn't get to experience this miracle of an opportunity.
Thank you so very, very much for your huge, huge generosity.
Our next blog will discuss the IP. How can an IP begin the process of identifying their surrogate? What are the qualifications? How to get started? All this and more….
* Names of surrogates have been changed due to confidentiality.
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