Surrogacy remains one of the most misunderstood paths to parenthood, often clouded by myths and misconceptions. As more families turn to surrogacy to fulfill their dreams of having children, it’s crucial to address these misconceptions head-on and provide accurate information about this profound journey.
Understanding Modern Surrogacy
Before diving into common misconceptions, it’s important to understand that most surrogacy arrangements today are gestational surrogacy. This means the surrogate carries a baby created through IVF using the intended parents’ genetic material or donor eggs/sperm. The surrogate has no genetic connection to the child she carries.
Common Misconceptions Debunked
1. “Surrogates Must Be Doing It for the Money”
While surrogates receive fair compensation for their commitment, the notion that surrogates are “getting rich” or doing it purely for financial gain is far from reality. Most surrogates use their compensation for meaningful life goals like:
- Paying off student loans
- Making a down payment on a home
- Creating savings for their family
- Providing for her own family
The compensation reflects the year-plus commitment, medical procedures, and physical changes involved in carrying a pregnancy. However, when broken down hourly over the entire journey, the compensation is modest. Notably, in countries like Canada, surrogates cannot receive compensation beyond pregnancy-related expenses.
2. “Surrogates Must Have Trouble Giving Up the Baby”
This is perhaps the most pervasive misconception. Gestational surrogates enter the journey knowing they are carrying someone else’s child. Unlike a traditional pregnancy where parents prepare nurseries and have baby showers, surrogates prepare for the joyful moment of uniting a baby with their intended parents.
As one surrogate put it, “I went into it knowing it wasn’t my baby and not preparing for a baby to come home.” The moment of seeing intended parents meet their child for the first time is often described as one of the most rewarding parts of the journey.
3. “Surrogacy Is Only for Wealthy Celebrities”
While celebrities who use surrogacy often make headlines, the vast majority of intended parents are everyday people who have saved, sometimes for years, to build their families. Many have faced:
- Multiple failed IVF attempts
- Medical conditions preventing pregnancy
- Secondary infertility
- Are same-sex couples wanting to start a family
4. “Women Choose Surrogacy to Avoid Pregnancy and Save Their Figure”
This misconception deeply misunderstands the medical necessity of surrogacy. Women who pursue surrogacy typically do so after exhausting other options to carry a pregnancy themselves. It’s often an emotional decision made after facing significant medical challenges. Most would prefer to carry their own pregnancy if they could.
5. “Surrogates Are Being Taken Advantage Of”
Modern surrogacy is a highly regulated process with legal protections for all parties involved. Professional agencies ensure both surrogates and intended parents are properly screened, supported, and protected throughout the journey. Surrogates make an informed, autonomous choice to help create families, often describing it as one of the most meaningful experiences of their lives.
The Reality of Surrogacy
Surrogacy is a thoughtful, carefully planned collaboration between surrogates and intended parents. It involves:
- Comprehensive medical and psychological screening
- Legal protection for all parties
- Ongoing support throughout the journey
- Clear communication and expectations
- Professional agency oversight
For many families, surrogacy represents their best or only option for having children. For surrogates, it offers an opportunity to help create families while being fairly compensated for their commitment.
Moving Forward
As surrogacy becomes more common, it’s crucial to dispel myths that can create unnecessary fear or judgment. Understanding the reality of modern surrogacy helps create a more supportive environment for both surrogates and intended parents as they navigate this meaningful journey together.
The truth is that surrogacy is a profound collaboration between caring individuals who want to help create families and those who dream of having children. When approached with proper support, screening, and protection for all involved, it can be an incredibly rewarding journey for everyone involved.
About SurrogateFirst
SurrogateFirst was born from a deeply personal understanding of the surrogacy journey, rooted in our core values of endurance, transformation, hope, and the miracle of life. Our foundation is built on the profound experiences of real-life surrogates and the incredible impact their selfless acts have on countless lives.
Our mission comes from the heart: to be the most compassionate, supportive partner to our surrogates, ensuring their physical and emotional well-being, as well as their financial security. Every member of our team carries the weight of personal experience—whether as dedicated surrogates who’ve felt the joy of helping create families, as intended parents who’ve known the ache of longing and the thrill of dreams fulfilled, or as medical professionals who’ve witnessed the power of science and human kindness working in harmony.
With deep respect and unwavering transparency, we walk alongside you, crafting a personalized journey from the magical moment of matching surrogate and intended parents, through the intricacies of legal and financial planning, to the breathtaking experience of pregnancy, birth, and beyond. At SurrogateFirst, we don’t just manage a process—we nurture dreams, forge lifelong bonds, and help write the most beautiful chapters in people’s lives.
Ready to start your surrogacy journey? Contact our team if you have any questions!
